Grieving Men: Thoughts, Feelings, and Behaviors Following Deaths of Wives

ABSTRACT

Despite the growing body of literature on bereavement, grief, and mourning, little attention has been given to the impact of bereavement on men. This is particularly true for studies on the impact of death of spouse on the survivor. Using in-depth interviews, we explored the thoughts, feelings, and behaviors of twenty men following the deaths of their wives. The findings do not support prevailing assumptions that men are less likely to be emotionally involved in the conjugal relationship and, thus, less likely to grieve than women; or, if emotionally involved, less likely to experience grief. This research suggests that men may be emotionally involved in the conjugal relationship and that die death of a wife may evoke intense feelings. The majority of the men in this study both hurt and knew they hurt. What they did not do was to reach out to others for help. This finding has important implications for bereavement program development.

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Notes on contributors

Sarah Brabant

Sarah Brabant, PhD, CCS, is Professor of Sociology and Anthropology at the University of Southwestern Louisiana. She conducts the semiannual bereavement training seminar for Hospice of Acadiana, Inc.

Craig J. Forsyth

Craig J. Forsyth, PhD, is Associate Professor of Sociology, University of Southwestern Louisiana. Catherine Melancon is Program Director of Crescent House, a shelter for domestic violence under the auspices of Associated Catholic Charities, New Orleans.