Centered but not Caught in the Middle: Stepchildren's Perceptions of Dialectical Contradictions in the Communication of Co-Parents

Abstract

The researchers adopted a dialectical perspective to study how stepchildren experience and communicatively manage the perception of feeling caught in the middle between their parents who are living in different households. The metaphor of being caught in the middle is powerful for stepchildren and this metaphor animated their discourse. A central contribution of the present study was to understand the alternative to being caught in the middle and what this alternative means to stepchildren. Reflected in the discourse of stepchildren is that to feel not caught in the middle is to feel centered in the family. Stepchildren's desire to be centered in the family was animated by the dialectic of freedom–constraint, which co-existed within the contradictions of openness–closedness and control–restraint. These contradictions are detailed in the analysis, along with advice to parents from the perspective of stepchildren. Implications for the interaction of stepchildren and their parents are discussed.

Keywords:

• Stepchildren
• Stepfamilies
• Communication
• Relational Dialectics

Notes

1. Clinicians have been using drawings as a therapeutic tool for a number of years (Malchiodi, 1998). As they are not clinicians, the researchers were careful to rely on participants’ discourse for interpretations of the meanings associated with the drawings.

Additional information

Notes on contributors

Dawn O. Braithwaite

Dawn O. Braithwaite is a Willa Cather Professor in the Department of Communication Studies at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln

Paige W. Toller

Paige W. Toller (Ph.D., University of Nebraska-Lincoln) is Assistant Professor in the School of Communication at the University of Nebraska-Omaha

Karen L. Daas

Karen L. Daas (Ph.D., University of Nebraska-Lincoln) is Assistant Professor in the Department of Communication at the University of Texas at San Antonio

Wesley T. Durham

Wesley Durham (Ph.D., University of Nebraska-Lincoln) is Assistant Professor in the Communications Department at the University of Southern Indiana

Adam C. Jones

Adam Jones (Ph.D., University of Nebraska-Lincoln) is Assistant Professor in the Department of Communication Studies and Theatre at Missouri Western State University