Understanding parents’ sense-making of their role in adolescent daughters’ social media use through the lens of relational dialectics theory 2.0

ABSTRACT

With the development of social media, parents must figure out how to guide their children’s use or even whether to allow it. Data were gathered through semi-structured interviews with 30 parents of daughters aged 12–18. Relational dialectics theory 2.0 was used to analyze how parents’ talk revealed their sense-making of their role in adolescent daughters’ social media use. Analysis revealed that parents voiced competing discourses pertaining to “bad” versus “good” parents and monitoring versus trusting daughters. Discourses that take place at the distal level compete with those at the proximal site of the utterance chain, challenging parents to engage in sense-making. Findings suggest that the advice of open communication between parent and adolescent addresses only the proximal level and not the distal level of societal expectations for monitoring and close involvement required of the “good parent.” To make sense of and manage competing discourses, parents appear to couple conversations with daughters with voicing discourses of daughter uniqueness as a way to favor trusting over monitoring and still maintain a “good” parent identity.

KEYWORDS:

• family communication
• social media
• daughters
• relational dialectics theory
• sense-making

Disclosure statement

No potential conflict of interest was reported by the author(s).

Notes

1. Interview excerpts were marginally edited to enable more clarity and readability.

Additional information

Funding

This work was supported by a College of Arts and Sciences (CAS) University Research Grant (URG) at Illinois State University

Notes on contributors

Aimee E. Miller-Ott

Aimee E. Miller-Ott is a Professor and the Graduate Program Coordinator in the School of Communication at Illinois State University. She teaches graduate and undergraduate courses in interpersonal and family communication, human communication and aging, and the dark side of interpersonal communication. She is the author of over 25 published research articles and 6 book chapters. In her research, she examines the ways that people manage identity and information through their communication, including in the contexts of family health (most recently focusing on family communication about Alzheimer’s disease) and non-traditional family types like foster families and families formed through surrogacy. Her major line of research in interpersonal communication focuses on co-present cell phone use in romantic relationships, friendships, and families. At ISU, she has received the Outstanding University Teaching Award, the Outstanding College Teacher Award, and the Outstanding College Researcher Award.

Lynne Kelly

Lynne Kelly is Professor Emerita of Communication. She joined the University of Hartford in 1982, after earning a B.A. in Speech Education from New York State College at Oneonta, and her M.A. and Ph. D. in Speech Communication from the Pennsylvania State University. She taught courses in group and organizational communication, interpersonal communication, computer-mediated communication, and communication theory and research methods. Her current research interests include communication technologies and relationships, especially the impact of cell phone use by co-present friends and romantic partners on relationship dynamics and outcomes.

Samantha Schultz

Samantha Schultz graduated from Illinois State University in 2022 with her Master’s degree in Communication. She currently teaches Introduction to Communication at both Illinois State University and Heartland Community College and is pursuing her Ed.D. in Teaching and Learning at Illinois State University. Her research interest areas include family communication, communication education, and communication pedagogy.