Abstract
Over the years Self and Society has been kind enough to publish pieces about our work with the psychological effects of boarding school and about our work with couples and gender. In this essay, which is adapted from my recent book on the psychology of boarding education, The Making of Them, I want to share some of our thinking on gender difference which partly arose from running workshops for Boarding School Survivors. We started putting on these workshops only for men, as an offshoot of the fledgling Men's Movement in the late eighties. However, we had so many letters from women telling us that they had felt damaged by boarding that we felt the need to offer groups for women, with very little idea of what we would find.