Abstract
I was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2004 and am only now beginning to see clearly the enormous and long lasting effects on me and on my relationships.
I write this article from my perspective, as a psychotherapist/primary breast cancer sufferer, based on my own experience. I also use anonymous quotes from informal interviews I have done with six women with primary breast cancer and quote feedback I have received from other articles I have written about the psychological impact of breast cancer, including in Self & Society in 2007 (Vol 35.1).
I am aware that, in writing what follows, I will be broaching contentious, even shocking, little spoken-of areas. I will use my own experience and, in the process, disclose some intimate and sad facts about myself, despite the risks inherent in such disclosures, not least of all, others' pathologisation of me. The risk I am taking in informed by my strong commitment to raising awareness of issues that I know are common concerns amongst women with primary breast cancer, and impact on our lives, but feel unspeakable, dangerous areas to explore, both privately and publicly.