“What Do You Say to Your Mother When Your Mother's Standing Beside You?” Birth and Adoptive Family Contributions to Adoptive Identity via Relational Identity and Relational–Relational Identity Gaps

Abstract

Grounded in the communication theory of identity, the present study explores how adoptive identity—an individual's understanding of what it means to be an adopted person—is influenced by the relational layer of his or her adoptive and birth family relationships. Seven focus group interviews were conducted in which participants were prompted to engage in a dialog about their experiences as an adopted individual. Analyses revealed that adoptees' relational identity with both their adoptive and birth families contributed in meaningful ways to their adoptive identity, but these relationships at times come into conflict with one another and with the adoptees' personal layer of identity, generating relational–relational and personal–relational identity gaps.

Keywords:

• Adoptive Identity
• Communication Theory of Identity
• Identity Gaps
• Adoptive Family Relationships
• Birth Family Relationships
• Adult Adoptees

Acknowledgments

The authors would like to thank Dr. Rebecca Meisenbach as well as the editor, Dr. Kory Floyd, and the three anonymous reviewers for their thoughtful comments on previous versions of the manuscript. This research was supported by the University of Missouri Arts and Science Alumni Organization Faculty Incentive Grant.