Intimate expectations and practices: freeter relationships and marriage in contemporary Japan

Abstract

Through an exploration of intimate expectations, ideals, and male freeters' romantic relationships, this article examines the ways in which expectations and practices of intimacy are shifting in gendered ways in contemporary Japan. Whilst women's expectations of intimacy and marital roles have changed and expanded, many male irregular workers continue to practice more conventional ideals of intimacy and gender roles, rooted in notions of responsibility, obligation, and duty. This article argues that there is consequently a significant miscommunication between male and female desires relating to the practice of intimacy that is contributing to both a perceived difficulty in getting married, and, after marriage, considerable stress about what is constitutive of intimacy.

Keywords::

• freeters
• irregular labor
• intimacy
• gender
• Japan

Acknowledgements

My sincere thanks go to the people who generously gave me their time, friendship, trust, and personal stories since my first fieldwork began in 2006. I am also grateful for the incisive and helpful comments that the editors of Asian Anthropology and two anonymous peer reviewers provided throughout the review process, and to Katrina Moore and Allison Alexy for comments on earlier drafts.

Funding

The research on which this article is based was made possible by the generous help of a Japan Foundation Scholarship (2006–2007), a Federation for Women Graduates Main Grant (2007–2008), the Meiji Jingu Studentship (2008–2009), and a JSPS short-term post-doctoral fellowship (2010–2011).

Notes

^1. This concept has been adapted from Morgan's (1996, 2009) idea of “family practices,” which was developed to illustrate that contrary to preconceived ideas of family there is considerable cultural and historical variability in the ways that people “do” family.

^2. The part-time worker figures refer to freeters only and not other categories of irregular workers such as temporary workers (haken) or day laborers. Female freeter numbers also increased between 2008 and 2011, from 830,000 to 870,000. However, the trend since 2004 has been a gradual decrease in female freeter numbers, which in 2004 were at 1,106,000 (MHLW 2012).

^3. Although official definitions of freeters define them as being between the ages of 15 and 34, I included self-defined freeters over the age of 34 in my research.

^4.Haken, short for haken shain, is a temporary worker employed by a temping agency and dispatched to companies. A pāto commonly describes a woman who is married and working part time. Finally, although arubaito is a broad category that has typically been used to describe part-time workers, my informants suggested that it is now used to describe students who work part time.

^5. Women working part time to provide supplementary income to the household has also been a feature of this pattern. It is important to note, however, that this is a middle-class ideal that, whilst normative, does not reflect the realities of all Japanese households. See, for example, Martinez's (2004) discussion of female divers (ama) in Kuzaki-cho.

^6. Recently in popular discourse, however, it is said that women in their twenties are looking for “sanpei” or the three averages – average looks, average wage, and average personality – as opposed to the sankō of the bubble era (high income, high education, and tall). It is argued that such “average” men will be the best bet to create a stable (antei) life with regard to salary and also to minimize the risk of infidelity (Fuji TV 2013).

^7. Alexy (2011) similarly found women complaining that they don't want to be mothers to their husbands.

^8. This corresponds to Jamieson's (2011) findings in the UK that, despite a belief in relationship equality and sharing of roles, many couples in reality end up splitting their responsibilities based on financial and employment constraints.

^9. Nagase (2006) notes in her study of contemporary attitudes to marriage in Japan that co-habiting with in-laws remains relatively common in non-metropolitan areas although it has become uncommon in large urban areas.

Additional information

Notes on contributors

Emma E. Cook

Emma Cook received her PhD in Social Anthropology from SOAS, University of London, in 2010. She is currently an Associate Professor at Hokkaido University teaching courses in the anthropology of Japan. Her research focuses on irregular employment, gender, the life course, and well-being in contemporary Japan.