Gratitude, freedom and refusal

ABSTRACT

This paper is an exploration of gratitude as a fundamental concept in psychoanalysis. Melanie Klein’s classic article “Envy and Gratitude” (1957) named gratitude at one pole on an axis of human suffering and flourishing, but with a few notable exceptions, the article stimulated research into envy. This paper explores the historical and philosophical traditions that have, to some extent unconsciously, influenced our contemporary understandings of gratitude. The paper also works to explore the social and ethical meanings of gratitude as well as gratitude’s psychoanalytic significance. The aim is to uncover the overall psychic significance of gratitude and its place in human flourishing.

Gratitude, liberté et déni

L'auteur de cet article étudie la notion de gratitude, un concept fondamental en psychanalyse. L'article devenu classique de Melanie Klein, « Envie et Gratitude » (1957), définissait la gratitude en la situant à l'un des pôles de l'axe de la souffrance et du développement de l'être humain, mais, à quelques exceptions près et non des moindres, l'article stimula la recherche sur l'envie. L'auteur explore les traditions historiques et philosophiques qui, dans une certaine mesure, ont inconsciemment influencé notre compréhension actuelle de la gratitude. Il explore également la signification sociale et éthique de la gratitude, ainsi que sa signification psychanalytique, avec pour objectif de mettre au jour la signification psychique de la gratitude et sa place dans le développement humain.

Dankbarkeit, Freiheit und Verweigerung

In diesem Beitrag wird die Dankbarkeit als ein grundlegendes Konzept in der Psychoanalyse untersucht. Melanie Kleins zentrale Arbeit “Neid und Dankbarkeit” (1957) benennt die Dankbarkeit als einen Pol auf der Achse von menschlichem Leiden und Gedeihen. Mit einigen bemerkenswerten Ausnahmen regte der Artikel vor allem die Forschung über Neid an. In diesem Beitrag werden die historischen und philosophischen Traditionen untersucht, die unser heutiges Verständnis von Dankbarkeit - zum Teil unbewusst - beeinflusst haben. Außerdem werden die soziale und ethische Dimension sowie die psychoanalytische Relevanz der Dankbarkeit untersucht. Ziel ist es, die grundlegende psychische Bedeutsamkeit der Dankbarkeit und ihren Platz im menschlichen Wachstum herauszuarbeiten.

Gratitudine, libertà e rifiuto

L'articolo prende in esame la gratitudine come concetto psicoanalitico fondamentale. Nel suo famoso lavoro intitolato “Invidia e gratitudine”(1957), Melanie Klein collocava la gratitudine su uno dei due poli di un asse individuato da un lato dalla sofferenza e dall'altro dal florido sviluppo umano - eppure, con poche eccezioni, quell'articolo ha ispirato soprattutto ricerche ulteriori concernenti l'invidia. Lo scopo del presente lavoro è di esplorare le tradizioni storiche e filosofiche che hanno influenzato, in quache misura inconsciamente, il modo in cui oggi intendiamo la gratitudine. Verranno altresì esaminati i significati sociali ed etici della gratitudine, accanto al senso e alla rilevanza specificamente psicoanalitica di questo concetto. L'intento è di offrire qui una visione d'insieme del significato psichico della gratitudine e del posto che essa occupa nello sviluppo sano delle persone.

Gratitud, libertad y rechazo

El presente trabajo es una exploración de la gratitud como concepto fundamental en psicoanálisis. Klein, en su artículo clásico “Envidia y gratitud” (1957), denominó gratitud a uno de los polos del eje del sufrimiento y florecimiento humano; sin embargo, salvo contadas excepciones notables, dicho escrito estimuló investigaciones sobre la envidia. Este trabajo explora las tradiciones históricas y filosóficas que han influido, en cierta medida de forma inconsciente, en nuestra manera de entender hoy la gratitud. También se explora aquí su significado social y ético, así como su significado psicoanalítico. Se busca develar la significancia psíquica general de la gratitud y el lugar que ocupa en el florecimiento humano.

KEYWORDS:

• Affects/affective disorders
• contemporary Kleinians
• ethics
• Freudian theory
• history of psychoanalysis
• philosophy

Disclosure statement

No potential conflict of interest was reported by the author(s).

Notes

1 An earlier version of this paper was delivered as the Karl Abraham Lecture at the Berlin Psychoanalytic Institute (11 June 2023).

2 In German: “DEM ANDENKEN/ Karl Abrahams/ IN DANKBARKEIT UND/ VEREHRUNG GEWIDMET” (Klein, 1932a, 1932b, 1980).

3 This paper develops ideas I began to discuss in Imagining the End: Mourning and Ethical Life, but it takes them in a more specifically psychoanalytic direction. For interconnections with Ludwig Wittgenstein’s conception of Ethics, gratitude that anything at all exists, and gratitude as a source of a religious impulse, see Lear (2022, 119–144).

4 In other contexts kháris is used more generally to mean favor in a broad sense; here Aristotle is giving it a special meaning. See Kostan (2006, 156–168).

5 Of course, a certain indefiniteness necessarily pervades the experience. The infantile experience of gratitude is preverbal and, as Klein acknowledges, our verbal formulations necessarily bring more conceptualization and thus articulation than is there (1957, 179 n.1).

6 This paper must leave for another occasion analyses of inauthentic gratitude, defensive imitations of gratitude and unconsciously motivated pretence. This paper confines itself to exploring genuine gratitude when it is working well. The hope is that will open space for well-defined differential diagnoses.

7 For further discussion of the unconscious as an imaginative a priori, see Lear (2019a, 2019b).

8 Herbert Rosenfeld has shown how in narcissistic patients a sense of omnipotence defends against painful experiences of envy (1964). He also argues that, with a narcissistic patient, a sense of omnipotence can be enlisted as defence against a drive toward death (1971). This is an all-or-nothing choice: if the narcissistic patient is not the source of his own life, he would prefer not to be. These important insights raise further questions about the psychodynamics of the envy–omnipotence–gratitude triad. For instance, how do these psychodynamics persist in less narcissistically organized patients? Are there remnants? Or are there significant reconfigurations? For the purposes of this paper, I restrict myself to the simpler thought that a sense of omnipotence serves as a defence against the acknowledgement of dependence.

9 There is an analogy to be worked out between practical reasoning influenced by emotion and familiar inferences of logic. For Dodgson (1895) ( =  Lewis Carroll) showed: In the inference -- P/ If P, then Q/ Therefore: Q -- there is no extra premise “If P, and If P, then Q, then Q.” That is what it is for the inference to proceed logically.

10 I am here considering only the case where the person reasoning is trying sincerely to think things through. If a reasoner is so angry he becomes cynical – “I’ll make up whatever story I need to get revenge!” – that is a different kind of case.

11 Thus, one cannot tell simply by looking at the Angry Syllogism whether it is distorting thinking or not. There is no Archimedean point to determine whether one is thinking well.

12 So are analysts, but for now I am going to leave that aside.

* I am grateful to Matthew Boyle, John Coetzee, Cora Diamond, Francis Grier, Christoph Kniest, Gabriel Lear, Al Margulies, Glenn Most, Anselm Mueller, Edna O’Shaughnessy and Candace Vogler for their help in thinking through these issues. I would also like to thank the Reviewers of this Journal for their valuable comments.