Bad is the new good: negotiating bad motherhood in Finnish mommy blogs

ABSTRACT

In recent years, there has been a growing number of mommy blogs and other social media sites where mothers air their negative feelings about motherhood. Analysing four posts of two Finnish mommy blogs and their comments, the article explores the affective power of a “bad mom” figure in relation to the contemporary experience of parenting in Finnish settings; settings which have become increasingly child-centred. The article investigates how these popular blogs mobilise their readers through self-reflective yet ambivalent confessions and ironic criticisms of normative motherhood. The article argues that while the emotional work of the bloggers might not be able to dismantle the myth of the perfect mother, the figure of a bad mom can be seen as an attempt to make sense of the frictions and contradictions triggered by the exhausting nature of the gendered, intensive parenting culture. It further argues that in this process the figure of the bad mom transforms into a new “normal” while the notion of motherhood remains both affective and polarised.

KEYWORDS:

• Mommy blogging
• motherhood
• irony
• confession
• social media

Disclosure statement

No potential conflict of interest was reported by the author.

Notes

1. For example: Her Bad Mother http://herbadmother.com/; Selfish Mother http://www.selfishmother.com/; Huono Äiti (Bad Mother) https://www.huonoaiti.fi/.

2. Bad Moms, 2016 and Bad Moms Christmas, 2017.

3. According to The Hollywood Reporter Fox is in early development stages of a Bad Moms unscripted reality series. https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/live-feed/fox-developing-bad-moms-unscripted-series-1083214 Accessed 22.8.2018 energy.

4. Project Mama is referring to a front facing baby carrier. The common argument discussed on social media is that babies become overstimulated if carried facing forwards. Hip health and a proper support for baby’s spine are also common concerns.

Additional information

Notes on contributors

Mari Lehto

Mari Lehto works as a Doctoral Candidate in the Department of Media studies at the University of Turku (Finland). In her current research she examines how motherhood is lived and experienced in social media. She can be reached at [email protected]. E-mail: [email protected]