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Abstract
Both the sexual minority individual (SMI) and partner of the sexual minority individual (PSMI) in a mixed orientation relationship (MORE) experience stress, and stress related growth during the coming out process. However, the implications and experiences of this relationship through a dyadic perspective has yet to be explored. Using a phenomenological approach, this study examined the lived experience of the dyadic coming out process in MOREs through the theoretical lens of Meyer’s (Citation2003) minority stress model and Vaughan and Weahler’s (2010) coming out growth (COG) model. Data analysis with nine MORE dyads provided a first-hand account of how minority stress and COG flow through the dyad before, during, and after SMIs and PSMIs engaged in the coming out process. The findings confirm the applicability of minority stress and COG theories to both members of the MORE. Themes that emerged in the data include awareness, disclosure, discovery, grief, support, and reconstruction.
LAY SUMMARY
Mixed orientation relationships (MOREs) are intimate relationships of partners with differing sexual orientations. Individuals in these relationships experience stress and relational difficulties tied to the coming out process as a sexual minority. Research on MOREs have focused primarily on the stress related to a partner coming out as detrimental to the intimate relationship and little literature has examined this relationship under a stress related growth framework. The purpose of this study was to examine the lived experience of the coming out process of MOREs through the theoretical lens of Meyer’s (Citation2003) minority stress model and Vaughan and Weahler’s (2010) coming out growth (COGs) model. The authors interviewed nine couples who identified as being in a MORE. Data analysis found minority stress and COG theories to be applicable to both members of the MORE. Themes that emerged in the data include awareness, disclosure, discovery, grief, support, and reconstruction. These findings are significant to mental health professionals by providing a systemic perspective through which to conceptualize common stressors and growth factors during the coming out process of a MORE.
Disclosure statement
The authors declare that there is no conflict of interest.
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Notes on contributors
Matthew Reid
Matthew Reid, AAMFT earned a Master of Science in Marriage in Family Therapy from The Graduate School at Northwestern University in 2021. As a graduate student, Matthew conducted research on Mixed Orientation Relationships in Casey Gamboni’s research laboratory at The Family Institute at Northwestern University. Matthew’s research interests explore gender and sexual identity development.
Casey Gamboni
Dr. Casey Gamboni, PhD, LMFT is the Director of Programs and Pinnacle Counseling-Chicago and teaching and supervisory faculty at The Family Institute at Northwestern University within the department of center for applied psychological and family studies. He is a marriage and family therapist who completed his Ph.D. in couple and family therapy the spring of 2019 from the University of Iowa. His masters is in marriage and family therapy from The Family Institute at Northwestern University which was completed the spring of 2016. Dr. Gamboni’s research and clinical specializations are in sexual/gender minority individuals, sibling relationships, emerging adulthood, and the intersections of those three topics.
Lauren Bailey
Lauren Bailey, MA is a Master of Arts in Counseling student at The Family Institute at Northwestern University within the department of center for applied psychological and family studies. As a member of Dr. Casey Gamboni’s lab, she conducts research on the experience of Mixed Orientation Relationships in Counseling.