They must be sick: consensual nonmonogamy through the eyes of psychotherapists

Abstract

This study examined current and prospective psychotherapists’ attitudes toward different relationship types (monogamy, polyamory, swinging, and cheating). The sample consisted of 324 participants who were presented with hypothetical vignettes of couples involved in each type of relationship and seeking the help of a psychologist due to symptoms of depressive disorders, alcohol abuse, erectile dysfunction, or marital conflicts. The participants rated relationship satisfaction, the morality-, and competence-related abilities of the clients, hypothesized about the source and possible solutions to the problem, and assessed the possibility of finding a therapeutic solution. People in nonmonogamous relationships were rated lower than monogamous ones on scales related to relationship satisfaction, morality, and cognitive abilities. Moreover, the participants often associated the source of nonmonogamous clients’ problems with their lack of sexual exclusivity, while the source of problems in the case of monogamous clients was usually assessed as being unrelated to any aspects of the relationship. A qualitative analysis of the hypotheses and solutions points to strong pathologization of consensual nonmonogamy: it was assumed harmful to the relationship, and people who engage in it were attributed numerous psychologically negative qualities. A distinct tendency to persuade clients to stop pursuing the open relationship format was also visible.

Keywords:

• Consensual nonmonogamy
• polyamory
• swinging
• attitudes
• psychotherapy

Disclosure statement

No potential conflict of interest was reported by the authors.

Figure 1. Moral, relational, and competence-related attributions—the effect of relationship type.