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Abstract
Psychotherapy is a queer—meaning unconventional—space. It is an intimate, intense, and transitional space in which the therapist and patient are encouraged to “play” within their counter/transference. Optimally, this means it is a creative, expansive space where therapists and patients allow any thoughts, feelings, and fantasies to emerge, allowing formerly foreclosed or unknown experiences to be opened, considered, and better metabolized. Sometimes these explorations will involve erotic and loving feelings, thoughts, and fantasies, and some of the therapist's sexual and loving feelings will be for patients of the same sex and/or gender, no matter how the therapist and patient self‐identify. Therefore, to stay open to such feelings, therapists may find it helpful to employ a constructionist rather than an essentialist notion of sexuality. This paper demonstrates that contesting the sense of coherence of such identity categories as “heterosexual,” “bisexual,” and “homosexual”—or queering psychotherapy—more meaningfully reflects our sexuality. Contesting identity categories also allows intersubjective therapists to more effectively meet the needs of their patients in at least four important, interrelated ways: by helping therapists create a more expansive space, by better understanding sexual attraction, by staying open to same‐sex (and other‐sex) desire and love, and by combating homophobia.