“Ghosts From the Past”: The Re-Emergence of Internalized Religious Stigma Following Diagnosis of HIV Among Northern Irish Gay Men

ABSTRACT

This article explores how previous exposure to religious homonegativity features in the sense-making process following HIV diagnosis in a homogenous sample of six gay men living in Northern Ireland. Interpretive phenomenological analysis was used to identify two key overarching themes: Negotiating authenticity in unsafe space, which relates to the experience of negotiating same-sex attraction within religious environments, and Re-emergence of religious shame in diagnosis, which relates to the way in which the men made sense of diagnosis from the position of having been exposed to religious homonegativity earlier in their lives. Findings demonstrate how the men negotiated their sexual orientation within religious contexts and how a reconstruction of God was necessary to preserve an authentic sense of self. Despite reaching reconciliation, HIV was initially appraised within a retributive religious framework that served to temporarily reinforce previously learned shame-based models of understanding this aspect of the self.

KEYWORDS:

• HIV
• gay men
• religion
• stigma
• Northern Ireland

Acknowledgments

We wish to thank the participants who kindly agreed to take part in this study and also Positive Life—the HIV support charity in Northern Ireland who supported this study throughout and who took time to help in the recruitment of participants. Special thanks go to Dr. Kate Russo, Queens University Belfast, for her extremely valuable support in the analysis of the data.