Intimacy-sexuality needs of the bereaved: An exploratory study

Abstract

Using standardized, open-ended questions, 18 widows were individually interviewed to investigate how they coped with the many facets of widowhood, including intimacy-sexuality loss. Availability of family and/or friends as a source of support was found to be most important for satisfactory coping. Loneliness, isolation, loss of former friendships, and ostracism by former intimate friends were some of the perceptions of the widows.

Sexual problems, especially frustration, were evident among many widows. Adaptation to sexual frustration included sexual affairs with men who would not ordinarily be considered a partner, such as the married or one's physician. All widows reported that the sexual relationship was salubrious, which has implications for counselors and therapists comforting the widowed or providing death education. Each widow's individual personality and life events affected coping. Increased mental and physical ailments after the death of their spouse, especially in the first year of bereavement were reported by 15 of the 18 widows.