A Re(Defining) Moment: Eulogizing Good Death in the Face of COVID-19

ABSTRACT

Master narratives of “Good death” that render the circumstances surrounding COVID-19 fatalities as inherently “Bad” exacerbate the profound layers of grief people are experiencing as a result of the pandemic. This (re)defining moments essay engages autoethnographic writing and eulogy as methods to resist such master narratives. In particular, the author re-stories the loss of Katherine, a beloved one who died of COVID-19 “alone” in a hospital. The eulogy opens opportunities for sensemaking and (re)framing that allow the author and others to move from questioning why our loved ones have to die alone to asking how we resist master narratives of Good death and lonely dying. In particular, the ceremonial narrative counter-stories Good death by exploring alternative understandings of dying alone and through honoring the many ways that Katherine dedicated her life to “accompanying” those experiencing loneliness in the face of suffering.

Acknowledgments

I wish to thank Lyle Payne and Emily Krebs for their feedback on the manuscript.

Disclosure statement

I have no conflicts of interest to disclose.

Notes

1. “Mad,” “Good grief,” “Good death,” and “Bad death” are capitalized to indicate resistance in the face of biomedical approaches and master narratives of grieving and dying.

2. Mad Studies is a field dedicated to the embodied experiences, histories, cultures, and politics of individuals such as those who identify as Mad, mentally ill, psychiatric survivors, patients, or service users.

3. NILMDTS is an international, nonprofit organization that mobilizes volunteer professional photographers to provide free remembrance photography for families who have lost a baby who is typically 22-weeks gestation or older.