Is It Really Cheating? Understanding the Emotional Reactions and Clinical Treatment of Spouses and Partners Affected by Cybersex Infidelity

Abstract

The recent explosion in new portable electronic communication devices has generated the need for evolving clinical thinking about the meaning of spousal infidelity in the age of these new media. To further the understanding of the emotional reactions of those affected by Internet, Smartphone and social media-related infidelity, an online survey of spouses or committed partners of cybersex users was created and 35 responses analyzed. The results show that even when sexual behaviors are limited to online, partners can lose trust in their loved ones, feel the need to seek assistance, and identify themselves as victims of trauma. Further, the results show significant reports of negative consequences on the partners’ relationships. Qualitative data offer support for the concept that partners’ feelings and actions that were formerly considered indicative of codependency can be normative behaviors of trauma victims seeking to regain control of their lives. Recommendations for clinicians working with partners are presented.