‘Being a good girl’: mother-daughter sexual communication in contemporary Vietnam

Abstract

This paper examines the ways in which certain fractions of urban educated women residing in Hanoi, Vietnam communicate with their daughters about sex and pleasure, and the various meanings attributed to these verbal interchanges. Drawing on a limited number of qualitative in-depth interviews, the findings suggests that these intimate conversations were framed by discourses concerning the purity of ‘modern’ women. A distinct lack of sexual knowledge and experience, along with a more generalised shyness in communicating about sexual matters, continue to be highly indicative of those deemed to be ‘women of purity’, especially before marriage. Such beliefs and allied practices were adhered to not only by mothers, but also by women themselves, exerting significant influence on the determination and expression of sexual perceptions and behaviours.

Keywords:

• Confucianism
• mother–daughter communication
• sex education
• sexuality
• Vietnam

Acknowledgements

I thank all the women who participated in the study. Their open discussion of personal and intimate experiences provided the data on which this article is based.

Disclosure statement

No potential conflict of interest was reported by the author(s).

Additional information

Funding

This study was funded by La Trobe University, Australia and an International Association for Sexuality, Society and Culture Studies (IASSCS) 2011–2012 research grant.