Parenting gone wired: empowerment of new mothers on the internet?

Abstract

The extension of information and communication technologies is purported to provide great opportunities for women, with the potential for empowerment and feminist activism. This paper contributes to the debate about women and cyberspace through a focus on the role of the internet in the lives of a group of technologically proficient, socially advantaged white heterosexual new mothers. The internet played a central role in providing virtual social support and alternative information sources which increased these women's real sense of empowerment in the transition to motherhood. Simultaneously, however, very traditional stereotypes of mothering and gender roles persisted. A paradox is evident whereby the internet was both liberating and constraining: it played an important social role for some women while at the same time it encouraged restrictive and unequal gender stereotypes in this particular community of practice. An examination of new virtual parenting spaces therefore has a contribution to make in understanding changing parenting practices in the new millennium.

L'expansion des technologies de l'information et de la communication est censée pouvoir offrir de multiples possibilités aux femmes susceptibles de renforcer leur autonomie et le militantisme féministe. Cet article apporte un éclairage au débat sur les femmes et le cyberespace en examinant le rôle de l'Internet dans les vies d'un groupe composé de nouvelles mères de race blanche, hétérosexuelle, socialement plus avantagées et maîtrisant les nouvelles technologies. L'Internet a joué un rôle primordial dans le développement d'un milieu de soutien social virtuel et l'offre de sources alternatives d'informations qui ont permis d'accroître leur sentiment réel d'être autonome lors du passage au stade de la maternité. En parallèle, toutefois, les idées stéréotypées traditionnelles du maternage et des rôles sexospécifiques persistent. Un paradoxe émerge entre l'effet libérateur et contraignant de l'Internet: celui-ci a joué un rôle social important pour quelques femmes tandis qu'il a simultanément favorisé des stéréotypes liés au genre restreignants et inégaux au sein de cette communauté de pratique. L'étude des nouveaux espaces virtuels qui encadrent le métier de parent sert donc à mieux comprendre les pratiques des parents au nouveau millénaire.

Se sugiere que el aumento de tecnologías de informática y comunicación les ofrece grandes oportunidades a las mujeres, con la posibilidad de empoderamiento y activismo feminista. Este papel contribuye al debate sobre mujeres y el ciberespacio por medio de un estudio del papel del internet en las vidas de un grupo de madres nuevas, blancas y heterosexuales, privilegiadas socialmente y muy competentes en el uso de nuevas tecnologías. El internet jugaba un papel importante al ofrecerles apoyo social virtual y fuentes alternativos de información, lo cual aumentaba el sentido de poder real que tenían estas mujeres en la transición hacia la maternidad. Sin embargo, simultaneamente, persistían estereotipos muy tradicionales de la maternidad y los papeles de los géneros. Existía una paradoja en que el internet les liberaba tanto como les limitaba. Jugaba un papel social importante para algunas mujeres pero, al mismo tiempo, fomentaba estereotipos de género limitantes y desiguales en esta comunidad de práctica. Como consecuencia, este estudio de nuevos espacios virtuales para madres tiene algo que contribuir a nuestro entendimiento de cambios en las prácticas de criar a los hijos en el nuevo milenio.

Keywords:

• cyberspace
• internet
• mothers
• empowerment

Keywords:

• cyberespace
• Internet
• mères
• renforcement de l'autonomie

Keywords:

• ciberespacio
• internet
• madres
• empoderamiento

Acknowledgements

The authors are grateful to the University of Leicester who funded this project. Also thanks to the babyworld team and all the women who were interviewed. We are also grateful to the reviewers for their helpful and critically informative suggestions. We hope the final paper does some justice to their comments.

Notes

1 The term ‘virtual’ has been adopted here but it is not intended to be read in opposition to the ‘real’, for as this paper shows, the links between the two are greater than the differences between them. For many people cyberspaces have become so integrated into their everyday lives they have become ‘real’ spaces (Dodge and Kitchin 2001: 21).

2 This observation must be considered in the context of the research fieldwork (1998), when use of the internet among new parents was not widespread. In 1998 it was estimated there were 30 million internet users compared to over 888 million in 2005 (http://www.internetworldstats.com/stats.htm, accessed April 2005). As the use and understanding of the internet matures and it becomes more intricately embedded in people's lives, it is likely that the quality of friendships will deepen and supportive networks will emerge ‘on the ground’ where babyworld users are in geographical proximity. Indeed, a message recently posted on babyworld's antenatal club's homepage noted how twenty mothers who were members of babyworld's December 2000 antenatal club met up and visited London zoo together with their children (http://www.babyworld.co.uk/community_intro/antenatal.asp, accessed April 2005).

3 More recently discussion forum netiquette pages (http://www.babyworld.co.uk/bbs/netiquette.asp, accessed April 2005) and terms of use pages (http://www.babyworld.co.uk/bbs/discussion_rules.asp, accessed April 2005) have been developed which lay down netiquette rules with respect to conditions of use, safety and legal issues. This has formalized the more informal ‘caring/sharing’ ethic.

4 Interestingly it should be noted that more recent news archives include reports on fathers needing more time off work to help with newborns, the importance of fathers’ role in parenting (http://www.babyworld.co.uk/news/june01/180601father'srole.asp, accessed April 2005) and lone fathers facing discrimination in work and lacking support services (http://www.babyworld.co.uk/news/oct-01/091001_lone_fathers.asp, accessed April 2005). The hot topic section of babyworld also has a section ‘for dads’ which includes discussions on ‘what men worry about’, ‘how to support your partner’ and ‘dads in the delivery room’ (http://www.babyworld.co.uk/hottopics/fordads/default.asp, accessed April 2005). This hints that some changes may be occurring in constructions of parenting on this internet website.

5 This is not always the case. Some examples exist of more liberatory and emancipatory gender roles played out on the internet. Davies (2004), for example, highlights how girls using the Babz software and website do not passively accept traditional maternal stereotypes.