Mending broken hearts with a throw of the dice

Abstract

Three case studies of therapy with heartbroken men are presented. Therapy progressed in three stages: (1) gaining insight into the distinction between love and attachment, (2) drawing lessons about the clients' needs and behaviors in love relations and (3) coping with pain producing ruminations. Six most prevalent disturbing thoughts were identified and corrective statements were formulated. Clients were asked to rehearse hourly one of six disturbing thoughts chosen with a throw of a dice. They all felt a marked relief after two or three days. Some possible explanations of the effectiveness of using dice are offered.

Keywords:

• loss
• extramarital sex
• intrusive thoughts
• love
• chance
• broken heart

Notes

Uri Wernik, Psy.D is a clinical and medical psychologist as well as a certified sex-therapist. He is a member of the www.transtherapy.org board of directors. His last book, Chance action therapy: The playful way of changing, was published this year.