Animating the Capacity for Concern: The Imago Couple Therapist Embraces Winnicott

Abstract

This article examines the Imago couple therapist’s work through Winnicott’s concepts, such as holding, mirroring, and, especially, the capacity for concern. Drawing on vignettes from couples in treatment, I demonstrate methods employed by Imago therapists to encourage the expression of each spouse’s “true self” and enable the emergence of Hendrix’s “hidden,” “denied,” or “lost” self. The “manic defense” concept will elucidate the couple’s “exits” that serve to avoid intimacy, and destruction of the object. Negative and positive emotional reactions of the therapist are discussed. The opportunity for a corrective experience is also examined in light of neuropsychological research.

Keywords:

• couple therapy
• Winnicott
• capacity for concern
• corrective emotional experience
• Imago relationships therapy
• true and false self