Abstract
The Bonds of Love (Benjamin, Citation1988) continues to inaugurate new horizons for critical reflection on the psychoanalytic theorizing of human relationships in terms of unconscious-conscious dynamics with its inevitable insertion in different sociocultural constructions of power practices. I follow Benjamin philosophically through post-Hegelian critical social/political theorists, particularly Habermas, and psychoanalytically through her respect for Winnicott's analyses of early developmental struggles for individuality in the face of fear of loss and destructiveness. Philosophical/Psychoanalytic inspiration carries her quest. This article excavates questions weaving throughout the book: Is an ideal of recognizing ourselves and others as “free” individual subjects possible? Could a psychoanalytical dialectics help us to live more responsibly with each other's differences not withstanding ineradicable past trauma? Is there possibility of life together, even in our gender differences, beyond the dialectical spell of erotic domination/submission?