“I love you as both and I love you as neither”: Romantic partners’ affirmations of nonbinary trans individuals

Abstract

Background: Transgender microaffirmations are subtle endorsements of a person’s gender identity through both verbal acknowledgements and behavioral gestures. Microaffirmations positively impact individuals who identify as transgender by acknowledging their gender identity and by communicating a sense of support and validation.

Aims: This study focuses on microaffirmations specifically directed toward nonbinary transgender individuals within romantic relationships.

Methods: Participants included 161 adults who identified as nonbinary: 85 who identified as gender nonconforming and 76 who identified as agender. These participants were either currently in a romantic relationship or had been in a romantic relationship within the past 5 years. Participants completed an online survey and provided examples of the microaffirmations they experienced from their romantic partners.

Results: Responses were analyzed via thematic analysis, resulting in four overarching themes: (1) Identity Validations, acknowledgement and acceptance of nonbinary identity; (2) Identity Endorsements, active endorsements of nonbinary through language or behavior; (3) Active Learning, self-education about nonbinary identities; and (4) Active Defense, interruptions of others’ negative actions directed at nonbinary partners.

Discussion: Discussion of the results focuses on understanding how microaffirmations operate to complicate binary notions of gender/sex and positively influence nonbinary transgender individuals in interpersonal relationships.

Keywords:

• Microaffirmations
• nonbinary romantic relationships
• transgender

Disclosure statement

No potential conflict of interest was reported by the authors.

Notes

1 The singular they pronoun in place of his or hers is also used to acknowledge nonbinary identities that are expected within our sample, and the use of pronouns that do not assume the gender binary.

2 Although some individuals who identify as MTF (trans women) or FTM (trans men) may conceptualize their gender as binary, we recognize there are trans women and men who also identify as nonbinary.