An [AUTO]ethnographic account of constructing, deconstructing, and partially reconstructing a coaching identity

Abstract

This reflective autoethnography illuminates the intricate mechanisms that impact identity construction and deconstruction. Set within the context of football coaching, the author draws upon lived experiences to show his struggle to establish and maintain an identity. By taking the unusual step of exposing his self-doubts and fears, it is the author’s hope that the article will offer comfort to other coaches (and young people in general) experiencing similar difficulties. Signposts are also offered, which direct the reader to the relevant identity literature. Finally, the narrative is evaluated and the benefits to the coaching and psychology communities are discussed.

Keywords:

• role identity
• coaching
• football
• manager
• soccer

Acknowledgement

The author would like to give thanks to Dr Ian Boardley, Dr Stewart Cotterill, Professor David Gilbourne, Dr Fergus Guppy, Dr Robert Morris, Dr Emily Oliver, Dr Brett Smith, and three anonymous reviewers for their opinions and guidance in this first endeavour into autoethnographic research.

Notes

1. Excluding the first author, pseudonyms are used throughout.

Additional information

Notes on contributors

John P. Mills

John P. Mills is an associate lecturer at Buckingham New University and Doctoral Fellow at the University of Birmingham. His research focuses on the psychological mechanisms that underpin successful leadership within sport and performance environments.