Summary
Loss of parents for midlife lesbians is discussed in the context of continued development in middle age. From an intersubjective point of view, comprehension of externality, the capacity for mutual recognition, the disruption and repair of recognition and affirmation of subjectivity and the agenic “I” color relationships with parents throughout life. In filial bereavement, there can be a resurgence of intersubjective development along with an easing of internalized homophobia. In recovery from loss, there are opportunities to make loving identifications that more fully acknowledge externality and difference.